Your pregnancy test came back positive.
Maybe you’re in school and still living at home.
Maybe you’re in college and fear a pregnancy will disrupt your plans for the future.
Regardless of your situation, your fears, and the emotions you’re feeling, at some point you need to tell your parents about the pregnancy. This can feel like a daunting conversation, especially if you aren’t sure how your parents will react.
Telling them may be one of the hardest things you do, and they may be upset. You will get through it. Here are five tips for helping you navigate this important conversation.
1. Pick the right time
As nervous as you might feel, it’s better to have this conversation with your parents sooner rather than later. This will help you know early on whether they’re supportive of the pregnancy or not.
It will also give you enough time to consider your options if their support or lack of support changes how you feel about the pregnancy.
In addition to telling them as soon as possible, you also want to consider the time and place in which this conversation should happen. Pick a time when you know they can focus their attention on you and when they won’t be distracted by siblings or other activities. Let them know you have something important you want to discuss and ask them to let you know of a good time.
2. Have a plan
Before you tell your parents about the pregnancy, it’s important to think through what you want. Are you considering abortion? Do you want to parent? Is adoption a decision you’re weighing?
Knowing what you want will help give you confidence going into the conversation. And if you aren’t sure you have all the facts on all your options, we can help.
We provide information on every option, as well as free medical services like pregnancy testing and ultrasound, so you can make an empowered choice for yourself and your pregnancy. No one should be forced to make a decision they aren’t comfortable with, and our staff can help you proceed with confidence.
At your appointment at Cleburne Pregnancy Center, we can also help you prepare for this conversation with your parents so you feel more comfortable going into it.
3. Bring a friend or your partner
If you think your parents will be upset, or if you fear a violent reaction, you should definitely plan to have a friend with you during the conversation. If your partner is in the picture and has a good relationship with your parents, you could plan to have him there as well.
Don’t walk into what could be an unsafe situation alone.
4. Get to the point quickly
This is not a conversation where you should beat around the bush. Instead, get to the point quickly and directly:
- Mom and dad, I just took a pregnancy test and it came back positive.
- I have some hard news to share: I’m pregnant.
- I need to tell you something important, but I’m afraid you may be upset with me.
- I love you both and hate that I may disappoint you, but I’m pregnant.
Plan out what you want to say and how you want to say it ahead of time. Think about how they might react and take that into consideration as you plan what you need to say.
5. Give them time to process
Especially if news of your pregnancy will shock your parents, give them time to process. Know that their first reaction may just be how they feel in the moment. After time, their emotions will calm and they may feel differently.
Be prepared for more extreme reactions. They may yell or shout. They may give you the silent treatment. They may say things they later regret. Try to be understanding and don’t take it personally. Remember how you felt when you found out you were pregnant, and know they’re feeling strong emotions about it, too.
It will be good to plan a follow-up conversation if they do react strongly. This will give you time to revisit the topic and share anything that you weren’t able to in the initial conversation. You’ll want to share your desires for the pregnancy, what you want to happen, and how your parents can be involved.
I’ve had the conversation. Now what?
After your conversation, if your parents are still struggling, don’t panic. We can help. There are free resources available to you and your parents as you navigate your unplanned pregnancy.
You can schedule another appointment to talk with us, and can bring your parents with you if they’re willing and if that would be helpful. We’re here for you!
Schedule an Appointment
To confirm your pregnancy or to talk with someone, contact us to schedule a free appointment today.